Sunday, February 15, 2015

Starting Anew....

Over the Christmas break, I tried to really reflect on my life and how January was a chance to start anew.  My life feels like a three ring circus a lot of the time so I think, overtime, I just got rid of things that made it hard for me to manage the chaos.  One of the things I dropped was the blog and I have missed doing it!  I thought about it so much over the last year or so and how I could make it work within my schedule and kids schedules. Plus, my precious babies are growing up and life, sadly, does not offer up enough time to pause and watch them how they are today!  But a blog can freeze their sweet faces, brief moments of their lives that I feel like I'm missing all the time!  So here's a brief update on each of much has happened in their lives!!!

Brady is weeks away from 6 years old!  6 YEARS OLD!!!  When did this happen?!??!  The most poignant change in his lives, and ours, was that he started school in August!  I sent my teeny, tiny baby out into the cold, cruel world (I'm dramatic) and it's been the hardest parenting decision I have made to date.  The summer before school started felt like a 3 month long internal wrestling match.  I went back and forth about school and home school and back to school until I, literally, couldn't think anymore.  In my heart, I wanted to keep him here forever, but I never felt super comfortable with the idea of homeschooling.  Whether it's because of my weaknesses (ie patience) or because the Lord needed him to be bright light for his friends, I just couldn't make homeschooling feel good.  So we sent him off to school and it was easily the hardest day for me and the kids.  I cried the night before, I woke up and cried.  I wiped away my tears long enough to help him get dressed and feed him breakfast.  I drove him to school that morning and felt like my heart was broken a little.  Having children means that a piece of you is living outside of yourself and when I watched this little guy walk into that big school, i watched a piece of my heart walk away.  It was a tough one for me.  I came home and cried.  Called my mom and we cried.  Talked to Nick and I cried some more.  But, after a few weeks of adjustment for all of us, he was loving it!  He is really excelling at school.  As a parent, you think your kids are the smartest, most beautiful people on earth.  But to hear other people say those things about your kids really makes all your time, efforts, prayers and tears worth it!  Brady's kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Little, just so happened to be a high school friend of my mom's.  That instantly put me at ease!  She is kind and thoughtful.  While Brady was adjusting to this new schedule, she was very strict, but always reassured him that he was good!  That won Brady over and us!  He's reading like a machine these days.  He's reading everything....I mean everything.  He reads every sign we pass, every book/magazine in every doctors office.  He is so proud and is reading well above his grade level.  I got volunteered trained and get to go into his classroom every week.  It's some of the best times of my week.  I get to see him in his element, meet his friends, help them with projects and just be a presence in the school.  That presence wins you A LOT of bonus points with the staff and they really start to love your child.  I felt like if I did anything this year for Brady, I wanted to make everyone who crossed his path to see him as we see him.  Besides school, Brady has gotten really into Pokemon and minecraft.  I don't know how these kids learn about this stuff, it certainly wasn't from us.  So we have checked out a lot of books from the library so we can merge his love of reading with the things he loves to do. The ipad started to become a real source of tension in our home so we limited him to only playing on Saturday for 90 minutes.  With these new hobbies, he hardly even asks us anymore.  It's been such a relief to see him doing other things!   He played soccer again this fall, his third season, and did really well.  He's getting so good and has declared it his favorite sport. On January 15, we celebrated his 6th birthday and it hardly feels possible that he's that old.  I still vividly remember waking up next to this hospital isollette and thinking, "OH MY GOSH, I AM A MOM!!!"  He was so small and beautiful and I just couldn't believe that he was mine.  We usually do parties on their even birthdays but he didn't want one this year.  He had a list of activities that he wanted to do instead.  The cutest thing is that they all centered around his family and that better illustrates who Brady is.  He is a sensitive and kind and FIERCELY loyal to us!  He takes his role of big brother very seriously, sometimes too seriously, but he's happiest at home with all of us there together.  He's my sweet little man and I couldn't be more proud of him!

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